Monday, December 05, 2011

Waiting......


Me and Craig going on a date......

Since my last post Thanksgiving and round two of high dose chemo has occurred. The second round has very difficult and I was sick for about six days. I have to be honest and say it was a dark week for me. I wonder how I can do this for another 10 or more months. My post HDC visit to my oncologist has armed me with several new anti nausea meds to try on the next cycle. I am glad to have them available in part and in part hate to have to take more meds. I suppose I have a decision to make before December 19th, round three. My appetite continues to be spotty as does my energy.

So many of you have stuck in there with me all along this journey. You have not once missed an opportunity to encourage me with prayer, words or even hitting the "like" button on Facebook. I feel less lonely in this because of you all. Even when I am too sick or tired to reciprocate, many of you continue to suffer long with me. I cannot thank you enough. Hang in there with me. You mean more and are helping me more than you can know.

When will I paint again? It is the question everyone asks. I feel as though I am wandering around trying to get a grip at the moment, still processing the last four months and getting accustomed to a new "normal." I have sold several large paintings in the last few weeks, so as they fly out the door, I am at least beginning to think about getting back to it. Do I even remember how to paint?...

Next MRI December 16th, trip to Duke December 19th...


"Do you not know? Have you not heard?
The Everlasting God, the LORD, the Creator of the ends of the earth
Does not become weary or tired. His understanding is inscrutable. He gives strength to the weary,
And to him who lacks might He increases power. Though youths grow weary and tired,
And vigorous young men stumble badly, Yet those who wait for the LORD
Will gain new strength; They will mount up with wings like eagles,
They will run and not get tired, They will walk and not become weary."
Isaiah 40

I am counting on Him.

9 comments:

Kathleen Krucoff said...

What a wonderful picture of the two of you.

Please hang in there Tracey. You continue to be in my thoughts and prayers.

Hugs
Kathleen

Anonymous said...

I love you.....

ben said...

Thank you for sharing the update, Tracey, and the verse which I need reminding of in my own recent experience which, though far from comparable to your own, has been rather tough to slog through emotionally in its own way. I was wondering how your most recent cycle of heavy chemo had gone, and am very sorry it was so brutal. I continue to pray for you, just about every day, and hope somehow the upcoming Christmas season is more restful and a blessing to you ... Ben

Maureen said...

"Deep peace of the shining stars to you, / which stay invisible till darkness falls / and disclose their pure and shining presence / beaming down in compassion on our turning world. / Deep peace of the shining stars to you!
~ Excerpt from a Celtic Prayer

May the stars shine brightest, and your blessings be many and give you comfort.

Hugs, Maureen

Elizabeth said...

sick and tired as you have been you look absolutely stunning!!! Good to hear that you have sold some big pieces- NOT ONE BIT SURPRISED- who knows perhaps you will embark on anew artistic journey when both you and your body are ready!!! It is intrinsic to who you are!!

I think of you (and Craig) all the time and Becca has asked me several times how you are doing. take the meds to help with the awful sick- even if you don't want to- anything to lighten the load of round three- taking the sharpest edges off could make all the difference for you!!

Big warm hugs to you both!!!

Elizabeth

Anonymous said...

Stay strong Tracy, stay strong we will be there soon! :)

-Love: Bruce, Sarah, Taylor, Erin, and Avery

Aaron said...

My prayers are with you and the battle you two face - may God give you an intimate sense of peace, love and good cheer this Christmas season.

L.Holm said...

Hang in there. Try every anti-nauseal available. If one works, it's worth it. I was sick for 6 months on chemo, and never thought I'd make it through. You are so strong, and Craig is, too. God bless you both. You are on a rough journey. It will get better.

Breland said...

You guys are cuteeeee!