All of Creation Groans

I can't sleep. I tried, but the images of the evening have hijacked my sound mind. Regret weighs on me.

"Section 60" is about the area in Arlington Cemetery where casualties of the Iraq war are buried. Several funerals, along with many heartbreaking graveside visits with family members make up the film. Witnessing the intimate agony of moms, dads, wives and children of these lost soldiers is unbearable. One father visits his son's grave lying down on top of it for hours at a time.

"Running for their Lives" is a short that brings to light the common practice of shipping racehorses who cannot run fast enough off to auction and slaughter. The graphic nature of the footage left me sick to my stomach. The reality that the puntilla knife is still in use as a kill method is barbaric. I cannot believe anyone can treat animals in this atrocious manner.

And, now, hours later, I sit in my dark living room feeling the wretchedness that is mankind. When I hear the statement that mankind is "basically good," that humanistic standard of thought, I always wonder how in the world anyone comes to that conclusion, because if we were to step outside our comfortable, pre-packaged lives, we would see how ridiculous a statement this is. We lie to ourselves because we don't want to face who we are. And we don't see the real nature of our souls without the Light.

All of creation IS groaning and suffering because of us. Our inherent nature is to kill, rob and destroy. Animals, and humans, become throw-aways because they don't suit our needs and wants. And the overwhelming sorrow I feel about that this night has me wide awake. And though I know Jesus will return and all sorrow and suffering, pain and crying will be wiped out, it is almost too much to bear. The only hope we have as a human race is Christ and He cannot make all things new soon enough for me.

Why do I choose animals as the subjects of my painting? Why do I feel so strongly about pairing animals with natural elements? Why does there seem to be a deep sense of connection in me to these things and an understanding of the harmony that exists among them? Even the fated brokeness of nature, brought about by humans from Eden until this very day cannot seem to overcome its beauty. On its own, apart from human interaction, I see the likeness of God. Imagination, balance, and "being." The natural world cannot be anything other than what it is. This is "beingness" if you will. Humans ruined this likeness of God in themselves long ago.

Shadows

I am becoming more and more startlingly aware that I am unable to change myself. Thus, I am increasingly aware that I cannot save myself. I am often stunned by the ease with which I turn my eyes to other places even though I know where Life lives. And unless the Lord God delivers me, I will be a shadow in a vast sea of shadows. My life will be lived utterly blind to His awesome presence always drawn away to various shiny objects that in the end are a lie and an illusion their only glory a momentary flash reflected off a glass wall.

Yes, unless He comes and rescues me, I am without hope. Today, He told me, "I am the good shepherd." Does he not leave the flock to go after the one who has lost her way? My confidence is that He will and that I will once again be swept away.

Guest post from Carol Clarke

Growing older is on my mind, as my 65Th is approaching. I used to wonder would I make it to 60 because my Mother and her Mother both died before they turned 60. That was before I knew the truth.

Psalm 139:16 says, "You saw me before I was born and scheduled each day of my life before I began to breathe. Every day was recorded in your Book!" I wish someone had told me that when I was younger. This verse gave great comfort after our 22 yr.old son was killed while duck hunting on Dec. 7, 1995. It took a while to accept that a strong, handsome, gentle Christian young man was ordained by the Lord to go live in Heaven after being shot in the back of his head. Then several of his friends reminded me he doesn't remember anything sad or bad when he woke up in Heaven. He is more alive than any ever. His life continues to be remembered by everyone who knew Philip and he will always be in our hearts. His brothers gave him a very loving memorial service sharing how much they all loved him. Also having his three brothers & their wives & five grandchildren gives a lot of joy to my husband & me. And the fact that all of them are Christians & solid citizens who have strong Christian values & Godly integrity brings immense satisfaction.

I may make it to 100 or 80 or less but regardless it is already recorded in "God's Book" and I have great peace that passes understanding that only a relationship with Jesus Christ gives me. So I am ready to live and ready to die the moment Jesus comes for me as Philip was and in the mean time I live with eternity in view. Oct. 30 would be Philip's 35Th birthday and I know he is with Jesus every day and they have joy beyond any we know here. I thank God every day for my adult children and for the way they have grown up so well.

CMC (Craig's mom)

Awake

In the haze of the day the mercy and grace of God seeps in and I am once again aware of the massive, and unfathomable presence of Christ in my life.
Here, today in the midst of the material, solid mass of shiny things innumerable ever present to catch my attention each second lives Jesus. Right here, now.
May I have the presence of mind in the moment that exists to turn all my thoughts to Him who has unleashed a wondrous wave of all that has meaning and all that is lasting in my life.

God's thumbnail sketches.....

Driving home from walking a client's dog this morning I was thinking about how fall-like the temperature is for August. The sky was so clear and the colors of the trees so vibrant. Fall is my absolute favorite time of year and I literally count the days to it's arrival. As I was driving and meditating over my love affair with the outdoors, 1 Corinthians 2:9 came to my mind:

"Things which the eye has not seen and ear has not heard, and which have not entered the heart of man, all that God has prepared for those who love Him."

I conjunction with a new painting I have been mulling over Romans 8, particularly verse 22:

"For we know that the whole creation groans and suffers the pains of childbirth together until now."

I usually think of Jesus' words about mansions when I think of the Corinthians verses, but today these and the Romans verse remind me of a new heaven and a new earth spoken of by Peter and Isaiah.

I am stunned by the reality that as beautiful as the creation is, as wonderful as all that we can see is, there will be a time when God recreates the whole thing in a way that we can never even imagine. And it is true, because I cannot imagine a day more beautiful than this morning and sights more amazing than the Canadian Rockies or the Grand Canyon. Yet the Romans verse reminds me that even in all it's glory, we still see the corruption, the groaning of the created underneath the beauty. I suppose those perfect glimpses as wondrous and momentary a they are may be God's gift of a small thumbnail sketch of what is to come.

The wisdom of Rich Mullins....

I am about to turn 40 in a few weeks...which is totally bizarre. I feel like I am 25. While cooling off from a morning run, I reached for my book of Rich Mullin's writings and this is what I read from 1995.

These words are SO very true, so all of you teen and twenty somethings read it TWICE.

"By the time you get this issue of RELEASE and read (if you do read) this little essay of mine, I will have celebrated my fortieth birthday. In my mid to late twenties I had some romantic, highly exaggerated notions about an early death - taking off at 33 - joining the company of Mozart, Foster, Jesus and other immortals who checked out in their early thirties. But this was a party I didn't get an invitation to - a gang I didn't belong in (me not being a genius and all). So, in Chicago I had my own party - celebrating the fun of being alive as opposed to the mystique of having an untimely death.

Because it's better to be alive than to be dead - that's for sure. And believe it or not - there are certain advantages in being 40 over being 18. Of course, there are certain disadvantages too, but - in keeping with the spirit of the 90's, I don't mind viewing those "disadvantages" as "challenges." Paul, I think had the perfect take on the pluses and minuses of life and death - "to live is Christ, to die is gain," so, that having been settled, I have made out a list of credits and debits about being younger and older - an issue that didn't seem as large or confused in the first century as it does at the end of the 20th:

At 18, if you have oversized aspirations, the whole world sees you as a dreamer. At 40, you get a reputation for being a visionary. (this is absolutely the truth in my life....TC)

At 18, if you've thrown in the towel, you're called a loser. At 40, you're called down-to-earth, a realist.

At 18, if you play in the rain or howl at the moon, if you paint or invent or compose songs or poems, you're accused of being childish. At 40, you are praised for being childlike.

At 18, time fits you like a pair of pants big enough to swim in. At 40, time fits so tight you can't button it's collar.

At 18, your sails are full. At 40, your rudder runs deep.

At 18, people misjudge your character flaws as being mere bad habits that they might change. At 40, people misjudge every bad habit as being the mark of weak character and they either dismiss you as being a lesson in reprobation or just accept you as a friend. Anyway, you graduate from being a missionary project into being either a lost cause or one of the gang.

At 18, no one knows as much as you. At 40, you begin to understand the wisdom of Solomon in his saying:
"Do not be overrighteous, neither be overwise - why destroy yourself? Do not be overwicked and do not be a fool - why die before your time? It is good to grasp the one and not let go of the other. The man who fears God will avoid all extremes." - Ecclesiastes 7:16-18.

So, stay alive. "A living dog is better than a dead lion" - and HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ALL OF YOU FROM ME."